New Planting - Novi Sad Newbie

Update

2010-09-08T15:36:00.003+02:00

I know it's been awhile since I posted, but life has been hectic. I've had comments asking how we are doing and sad to say, not well.

My love and I separated a year ago and our divorce was final in May.

He still lives in my city, has a good job and an apartment. We are still friendly.
I would say the communication problem was our biggest one.

I often think of my time in Novi Sad, our friends and the good times. Thinking of these things make me sad and happy at the same time.

Several of our friends in Serbia have suffered from health problems and there have been deaths as well. Seems to be a lot of cancer. I can't help but wonder if our bombs or their own bombs from the various wars contribute to this.

This time in my life was precious and helped me grow as a person. We had our ups and downs and if I had stayed in Novi Sad we would probably still be together. The changes and pace of life in America were just too much. I became independent again and all of the things that American women are and he was overwhelmed by it. I ended up comparing him to an American man and that was unfair too.

If I had it to do all over again, would I? YES, but hopefully I would be gentler on my family and smarter about it all. And I would hope that I would slow down and savor the good things longer.

Welcome to the world of work

2008-07-12T19:14:00.004+02:00

My love has gotten a good "starter" job at a local nationwide discount chain. This will give him the opportunity to work on his English and get out amongst people. He is such a friendly, people person that it has been hard for him to wait for his Social Security and green cards so he could work.

That wait is finally over.

He is able to walk to work - it's only about a 10 minute walk from here. He has the type of job where he will be trained in what to do and will have possible advancement to other positions.

In the previous weeks we have been enjoying our apartment, cooking at home almost everyday and going to some of the local festivals. Here is a photo of him and a new friend he made from a local TV station at the Mudbug Madness festival which celebrates the crawfish.

So, life goes on....we are happy and just working and getting settled here in America.

He is here!

2008-05-01T04:54:00.003+02:00

My love is finally here in America with me. He flew in last Wednesday, due in large part to the efforts of Senator David Vitter and Congressman Jim McCreary's offices. I am so grateful to the staff of these true public servants.

This past week has been busy and I continue to look over at him in disbelief that he is really here with me.

When I met him at the plane a friend of mine from work and her husband came along and we waved big American flags and had a nice little greeting for him.

My son and he hit if off right away and I am very grateful for that. He is happy for us all to spend time together and that is so important to my son right now.

My love has spent some time doing a few "honey-do's" around the apartment and has been cooking for me. It's nice to have good Serbian food waiting for me when I come home.

In a few weeks he should have his Social Security card and Green card, so then he can get a job. He is not the type to just sit home. Right now we are just enjoying each other's company.

Thank all of you who were sending good thoughts our way. I am very happy!

Whiny,whiny,whiny

2008-03-22T15:54:00.002+01:00

Well............ My love is all ready for his interview for his visa to come here. Only now the embassy is not scheduling interviews as people keep trying to BURN the damn place down!

No, really. They say it will be a month before they schedule him. This is such bull. I had hoped that things would move along and he would be here by the end of the month of March. But that was before the embassy had to close early every time there is a demonstration and before they had to go down to a skeleton staff.

I wonder if the people who do this vandalism realize how they hurt their own people? I wonder if they realize that blaming America for their problems is not going to help them in any way whatsoever as the last time I looked, Serbia was ruled by Serbians, elected by Serbians?

The good people of Serbia deserve so much better than all of this turmoil. I am truly sorry for anything that my country is doing to prolong any suffering. But, when you boil it down, anything that is going on in Serbia today is the result of bad governing internally over many,many years. Only the people there can solve this.

I just want my love here with me.

I Found It!

2008-03-02T17:36:00.003+01:00

I found a job! A very good one, in fact with a major department store here in Shreveport. There are several ladies working there from Eastern Europe and Russia and I am so excited to meet and speak with them all.

I sent in the papers on Friday to bring my love here. These are the final papers,so as long as the embassy remains open things should move along quickly now. I hope and pray that he will be here by the end of March.

He says things are calm now in Novi Sad and I am so glad. I have been so worried about his safety. I still am. Things can change in the blink of an eye.

I truly love these wonderful Serbian, Croatian, Bosnian, Albanian, Hungarian et al people that I have met there and pray daily for their safety and well being. I wish there was a way for this conflict to end and end permanently so that they could move on and prosper.

I will always treasure my time in their country and hope that when/if I return that I will find them all in good health and doing very well.

February Update

2008-02-06T19:13:00.001+01:00

I'm still looking for that elusive job. I have all kinds of applications all over town in Shreveport and Bossier City. I pray that something opens up for me soon. I know the perfect job is out there, I just have to find it.

Things are tough here between my son and my ex. My ex says that my son is not helpful around the house and lies to him about his chores, etc. I want to help. I know it is hard for my ex to be full time mom and dad as well as work in his own business. I take my son on the weekends, but he goes to high school in Shreveport and I can't drive him back and forth on the weekdays and look for a job as well. Gas is anywhere from 2.80 to 3.00 a gallon and I can apply online for many jobs so that saves me a little.

The media is not helping with their gloom and doom reports on the news every night. They seem almost happy when the economic news is of a downturn in the markets or fewer jobs being created. After coming back from Serbia, I want to tell them what bad economic news really is.

I think this is typical of election years in the US. No matter what happens, we will have a new President. George Bush can't run again...he is out. That is the sure thing. The only questions now are which party will be in power in Congress and which party will the President belong to. The markets and employers are nervous, and the media wants to sell papers and advertising time by fanning the flames to make the story better...meaning more gloom and doom.

You know, the truth is, no matter who gets to be President or who runs Congress, the real power in the US is held in the beaucracies and those people are government employees who never leave...can't be fired, don't have to worry about layoffs like regular people. Others come and go, but they remain and they "write" laws through beaucratic policies and regulations, most of which are not subject to review or revision by anyone. The US will go on as it always has, these people have the power and they provide the continuity...for good or bad.

Update

2008-01-18T18:38:00.000+01:00

Well, I haven't had any luck finding a good paying job in Longview, so I am now looking in my old hometown of Shreveport, LA.

Longview is such a great little town...friendly people, not a lot of traffic, clean, etc. Problem is, because it is a small town there is only one mall there and not many jobs available in the field I am interested in. Oh well.........

Please,guys, wish me luck! I am so ready to get to work and get my husband here to the US. It is so very hard to have a long distance relationship. I worry all of the time about him and he worries about me. I can't express the sadness, the loneliness and the misery of being away from him. We speak on the phone every few days, and we email constantly, but that is just enough to keep me from going completely nuts.

The only good in this is that I see my son now almost every weekend. He is my bright spot.

Greetings From Longview Texas

2007-12-17T18:40:00.000+01:00

I am in Longview, TX now. I have been here for about 2 weeks. I am living with my parents...starting over. My husband is still in Novi Sad. We are waiting for papers from a former student of his who will co-sponsor him with me. I am also trying to find a job so that I can sponsor him.

I bought a little car and will be looking for an apartment for us soon. Everyone here has been very friendly and very helpful, so I feel good about making this our home.

It is nice to be close to my son. We have had two very nice weekend visits so far. He was at the airport to meet me, which was a surprise.

I spoke to my daughter, but have not seen her.

I miss my husband and my friends in Novi Sad. This is very hard. On the one hand, I know we can be happy in America. On the other hand, this is a slow process and I miss my husband terribly. I would not recommend to newlyweds that they be alone during the holidays.

I'm not sure what I will be doing for Christmas Eve. My parents will probably go to my ex's house to see my kids. I'm not invited. I may go to the local church here for Midnight Mass...I'm not sure. I know I will spend Christmas day with my parents, so that will be nice. My son will probably come spend a few days with me after Christmas.

Heading Home

2007-11-26T06:52:00.000+01:00

This weekend I will be returning to American to get a job and an apartment and wait for my husband's visa to come through so he can join me.

There is something about this time of the year. Last year, I returned to America for the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays. Hopefully, next year my husband and I will be together for Christmas. It is going to be hard to be without him.

I expect that this will be a challenge. I am going to live with my parents for a time. Just until I get a job, a little car, and an apartment. I plan to live in the Longview,Texas area.

Longview is a beautiful little town with plenty of retail stores where I can find work in management. When my husband comes, he should be able to find work as well.
We're also talking about opening a Martial Arts school.

We want to live and work in America and save money for our eventual retirement. We can't do that here. We hope to eventually return to the Novi Sad area. I would personally love to live in Čelarevo.

The political situation here continues to worsen. I haven't talked much about it because I frankly don't feel qualified to. I don't understand it. My American heart and soul rebells against what I hear and see on the news on a daily basis. It is incomprehensible to me how people can remain as leaders when they don't have the confidence and support of the people they are supposed to serve. Probably since they don't have to fear the ballot box, they can do as they please.

I love the people of this area, I only wish they had the opportunities and the life that they deserve. I'm sure some would say that I am being unfair, judgmental or imposing my "American ideals", but I have spoken to many people since I have come here and this is the impression they give me.

I appreciate the cyber-friends I have made since beginning this blog. When I get internet access, I will continue to update the blog with news. I will keep reading your blogs and hope that you read mine for as long as it interests you...

Please, wish us luck and if you pray, please pray for us.

St. Luke Slava

2007-11-09T08:31:00.000+01:00

On Oct. 31, my new husband and I went to my Kum's house to celebrate his Patron Saint St. Luke's slava.

The slava is a Serbian Orthodox tradition. The family celebrates their Patron Saint every year. Each family has their own Patron Saint, taken from the father. A married woman will take the slava of her husband. This tradition has been called the heart of Serbia - it is specific to the country.

Everyone brings a gift. Usually, it is wine or liquor for the host and flowers for his wife. Flowers here are truly beautiful...huge blooms and wonderfully scented.

The family will invite their closest friends and relatives to this party and they feast on traditional dishes. The ceremony begins with the lighting of the slava candle and a prayer. The most important of the foods served are "slavski kolač"-"the slava cake" a yeasty bread that is served by bringing it to the table whole and then tearing it into pieces by hand and Koljivo (also called žito) which is made of boiled wheat flavored with ground walnuts, nutmeg and honey. The Koljivo is served in a bowl which is taken around to the guests on a tray with a small spoon for each guest. You make the sign of the cross and take one little spoonful of the Koljivo. You put your used spoon in a glass of water on the tray. Each guest is approached one at a time. Red wine and rakija (homemade brandy) are served to drink. Red wine symbolizing the blood of Christ.

At this particular slava, we ate sarma (minced meat, rice and spices in cabbage rolls) and a freshly roasted pig. The host's Kum was presented with the pigs head as a token of the respect he has for her:

The pigs head is considered a delicacy and is reserved for the guest of highest honor.

My Kum is not a particularly religious man, so there was no priest at this gathering. From what I understand, many people do have a priest conduct the service at their slava. My Kum's daughter lead the prayers and read from the Bible.

After these ceremonies were completed, it was time to eat, drink and be merry. Music is an important part of the Serbian culture. People here love to laugh and sing. There was even dancing in this small room with 12 guests!

When I was watching all of the goings on, I couldn't help but think of how similar it was to celebrations I've been to in Louisiana...particularly South Louisiana. When I lived in Shreveport, I often visited friends in Abbeville, New Orleans, etc. and good food, laughter, music and dancing are an integral part of those celebrations as well.
Of course, in Louisiana, we feast on crawfish and beer and dance to the Zydeco music of Clifton Chenier!

And the closeness of the family unit is also a part of both of these cultures. My Kum's son lives in Austria, but he made sure to call during the celebration to wish his father well and to send his regards to the guests.

All Souls/All Saints

2007-11-07T15:06:00.000+01:00

This past Saturday we went to a large cemetery here in Novi Sad to visit my husband's parent's graves. This was in the midst of the All Souls/All Saints days celebrated by the Catholic and Orthodox communities.

I've never seen so many people at a cemetery in my life. There were cars parked on both sides of the main road as well as the side roads all around the cemetery. People made their own parking lots in the nearby fields.

Police were there to help with traffic flow around all of this.

In front of the cemetery gates, there are always people selling fresh flowers and candles. The flowers are gorgeous and the blooms are huge. This must be the best time of the year for the vendors....EVERYONE was handing over dinars.

We've been to the cemetery before. My husband regularly visits his parent's graves. From what I gather this is common here. I think it is very nice that the dead are not forgotten. In America, my deceased family members were buried far from where I was living, so visiting graves wasn't possible.

Inside the gates, there were people everywhere. On this particular holiday, people come and bring some food and drink to leave at the gravesites. I saw apples, loaves of bread, small cakes, etc. Some graves had only one or two mourners, others had large groups of people - whole families, I suppose.

We did what many people were doing: cleaning the gravestone, discarding dead flowers and replacing them with new ones, lighting candles and paying our respects.

There were some Roma kids in the cemetery, begging for money at the gates and riding their bikes among the gravesites. People here tell me that on this day, after people leave, they take the food that is left at the graves. If so, I guess it doesn't go to waste.

When people told me this, they weren't angry. It was more in the way of an accepted fact.

2007-11-06T09:30:00.000+01:00

You may now refer to me as Mrs. I....

The day of our wedding was cold and rainy.

I was cleaning the apartment when his family arrived (30 minutes early!). My fiance was out taking the food to the place where the reception was being held, so I was alone. I got them all settled (not easy, since my Serbian is weak and their English is pretty much non-existent) and went ahead and changed into my "wedding clothes". I don't have any fancy things here so I just wore a black skirt and a white blouse. He wore his tux, but no tie, which was fine by me. I thought he looked very handsome.

They all had some drinks and then we went to the Novi Sad City Hall to be married. When we arrived, there were Roma out on the streets playing music on their instruments, attempting to drum up business. That's fine. But, there were also many of them out begging for money from everyone. They would come right up next to us, interrupting our conversations, and being quite obnoxious. After the wedding, when we were leaving, they practically followed us into the cars!

The place where the weddings are held is nice. It's a long hall with a red carpet on the floor and a large desk at the head where the Justice of the Peace (we would call it that in LA) and our translator stood. I had to have a translator, since I am American.

Our Kums and friends and family all marched up to the desk with us when the strains of the "Wedding March" began. Then we stood and the service began. The JP wore a sash in the colors of the Serbian flag and she performed the ceremony very nicely. Our translator gave me a copy of the ceremony in both Serbian and English. The whole thing took about 10 minutes.

Afterwards, we posed for pictures and then I threw the wedding bouquet. There were only two single women there. Here's a pictures of me and the woman who caught it:

I am very happy that Donna caught the bouquet. She is my husband's Kum's girlfriend and has always been very kind to me. She does my hair for me and when we travel for Martial Arts events, she always comes with us. She's a lot of fun.

Our reception was held at a friend's bar. It was a typical celebration for this part of the world with lots of drink, food, and singing. Later that evening, after we came home, my husband's friends from work came over for more food and drink.

The whole experience was very low key and comfortable. I've never been to a wedding performed by a Justice of the Peace in America, so I don't know if it would be the same. Since we are both older (I won't say mature) and this is not a first marriage for either of us, I think it was just perfect. The most important thing is that our friends and his family were there.

Seedlings

2007-10-22T14:05:00.000+02:00

Just have a few short comments and observations to make. Things are really hoppin' around here with preparations for the wedding and other things that I will talk about soon.

1. Slackbastard has commentary on the Novi Sad Nazi/Antifascist rally held recently. He took the words right out of my mouth.

2. My home state of Louisiana has made history! A reformer with an actual history of reform has won the governor's election. This is exciting news for a state that always ranks at the bottom of every list of rankings for jobs, education, income, etc. Looks like all the talk about throwing the bums out after Katrina may actually happen.

3. I made my first batch of sarma all by myself yesterday. This dish is my favorite of everything I have tasted since being here. With the weather being cold and rainy, it is a perfect time for sarma.

4. I've been deep cleaning the apartment the past couple of weeks. One thing I have noticed is how watery the cleaners are here. When I squirt some cleaner onto my sponge, I have to make sure I am holding it level or it will drip off. Jeeze.

5. We went to this huge store on Friday night. It's called Mega Market and it really is mega. It has the same type of goods as our Super WalMarts back home...household, electronics, food, bakery, etc. We were able to find this tea that we love and have looked for everywhere. It's called "Red African Bush Tea" by Fructus and it is really good when you have an upset stomach. The box has a picture of a woman who is not wearing a top - I suppose she is supposed to be African, but she looks European with a nice tan. We call it the "Tea with the Big Boobies", ala "Allo, Allo" one of our favorite TV series.

A Ring and A Date

2007-10-16T14:11:00.000+02:00

Our wedding is set for Oct. 28, 2007 - the day before my birthday. It's funny. Where I am from, people don't get married on Sunday. Here, it seems to be the busiest day.

We went last night and looked at rings. There is a street here in Novi Sad with jewelry stores one after another. Rings are priced together...the woman's and the man's.

We just walked down the street, going into each store in turn. We were looking for simple wedding bands and settled on one that is brushed with thin polished edges. I really like the ring and it's not too expensive. Some of the rings we looked at were over 300 Euro, which is quite out of our league - for that kind of money, I think there should be a diamond involved...haha.

We went to Novi Sad city hall after we got back from the American Consulate to turn in our papers to be married. The lady in the office there was very kind and efficient and got our papers in order and said that since this is an "international" marriage, I will receive a marriage certificate in English and in Serbian. I also must have someone there who is official to translate the ceremony for me. That's fine with me, I want to know what is said! This marriage will be legal in America.

She will perform the wedding. In Serbia, only civil marriages are recognized and they must be done in the city halls. The service takes 10 minutes, she said. There is a special room that the services are held in.

While we were in the city hall office, young couples came and went, scheduling their own weddings. When we were looking at rings, there were two other young couples doing the same thing. We kept running into them in the stores.

After the wedding, we will either come to our apartment for drinks, food and celebration or we may be able to rent a place in our building to hold this celebration. Depends on how much that will cost. There will be 12 of us altogether. In the meantime, I am doing some deep cleaning of our little place to be prepared.

Lots of people here have a church wedding after the civil ceremony. Since my love and I are both Catholics and this is the second marriage for each of us, we can't marry in the church. I don't want to get into all of that, but suffice it to say we are doing the best that we can with what we have. I feel blessed.

I spoke to my parents and both of my kids to let them know. It was very nice when I spoke to my daughter. I thought she would just hang up on me, but she didn't. We spoke for a few minutes. My love even said at one point, I laughed. I was so nervous and excited I don't remember much of what was said. It was very nice and again, I am grateful for answered prayers. There is still a long way to go, but at least there is a crack in the ice.

Quiet Sunday at Home

2007-10-07T09:36:00.001+02:00

I'm staying home today....Nazis are marching in Novi Sad. Wow....what can I say?

I can't be smug. Back where I am from, the KKK used to march on occasion - all 10 to 20 of them. Most of us would drive by honking and give them the universal signal for a**holes. They were a joke, no power, just a holdover from a dismal past.

Nazis, on the other hand, are scary.

I DO know that a counter-demonstration is planned. Hopefully everything will stay peaceful.

1 Hour in America, 4 Hours in Belgrade

2007-10-06T14:20:00.000+02:00

Our trip to Belgrade was fun. We left by train from Novi Sad at 8 and got in to Belgrade at a little after 9:30. Added on to the price of our train fare was 50 dinars for a little sticker affixed to our tickets for "Celebration of Children" week/month??? I don't know. No, it was not voluntary like that little box on the 1040 US tax form that you check to donate money for political parties. I figure some government official has a wife who dabbles in causes.

Anywho... We got to Belgrade and it was buzzing with activity. Lots of people walking and driving and heading everywhere fast. The part of Belgrade that I saw is like a mini-San Francisco. You walk uphill, you walk downhill. (My legs are still sore!) There were even functional trolley cars on the streets.

We had to head directly to the US Consulate. I had read that this place is considered US soil, so I was happy to be in the US for that hour.

I'm not a "my country - right or wrong" person, but I have to say that since I have been away from the US, I appreciate it so much more than I did. And, I have always loved my country. I miss it.

When we got to the Embassy, my fiancé was very hesitant about opening the door, he felt like we had to wait for someone to open it for us from the inside. I was like, let's go in! but, I deferred to him and soon someone came and opened the door to see what we wanted. As soon as I told him I was an American citizen and had an appointment he took my camera and my love's phone and got us through security quickly.

We sat in the waiting area of American Citizen's services with a couple of Americans, but mostly with people who were waiting to find out if they were going to get a Non-Immigrant visa to the US, for various reasons. I was a little irritated at the procedure that they used for these people. They call them by number to a little booth (like at a bank teller counter) and the consulate person is inside an enclosure and speaks to them through a microphone...forget privacy! The person who is requesting the visa doesn't have a microphone, thank God, but since some of the people spoke English, I could understand everything that was said. And for those that spoke only Serbian, the people in the waiting room could understand everything. I don't see why the microphone is needed.

When they called me, by name incidentally, there was no use of a microphone. The officer just spoke to me through the glass.
Now, why wouldn't that work for everyone???

Anyway, we got our business taken care of there, only had to wait about 45 min. and I got to read some old Newsweek magazines while I waited and had access to a clean bathroom with toilet paper and paper towels to dry my hands with. (You will not understand how much this meant to me unless you come here for a visit!)

As we left the Consulate, I stopped to take a picture of the outside, since it was the first time I had ever been to a Consulate or Embassy. As I snapped away, my fiancé was conversing with the guards out front. As we walked away, he told me that taking these pictures is forbidden, but when he told them I was a US Citizen, they said OK. OMG!

Afterwards, we had to go to the Ministry for Foreign Affairs (hmmm....how appropriate) to get our documents stamped and pay our tax (fee) and I had to sign a big book. Everyone was friendly and wished us the best.

Finally, we had finished all of the work we had to do. I had no clue where the mysterious Commissary was, so we just decided to walk around and see what we could see in the time we had left before our train left. About a block away was one of those buildings you read about when you read about Belgrade being bombed. I had never seen a picture, so here goes:

It was very disturbing to see those images, but I also realized clearly that it was meant to be a surgical strike. This building was a military headquarters. There were all sorts of civilian targets nearby (it is a busy main street after all), so if killing civilians was the idea, it could have been done on a massive scale. Again, I'm not political, I'm just saying it obviously was a target, not just a place to drop a bomb. And yes, it upset me and made me ashamed...OK?

We walked on down the street and found a gorgeous park with beautiful flowers all around and as our walk continued we found a lovely area with a fountain and a reflecting pool. Here's the park:

We made a large circle and came to a really impressive building set up on a hill. My fiancé called it Capital Hill, because this building is the setting for important government meetings and such. Here's me on the steps of this huge building:

And here's a shot of the building itself:

It was a warm and sunny day so the walk was nice. We stopped by a pekara (bakery) on the way back to the train station and got a yummy, flaky bread with cheese inside and walked down the street grazing on it.

I slept most of the way back on the train and we got home to Novi Sad at 3:30. We'll go to the City Hall in Novi Sad early next week and turn all of this paperwork in so we can get married.

UPDATE: I posted the photos from the trip to my Flickr account.

To Belgrade on Friday

2007-10-03T10:50:00.000+02:00

We have our appointment at the American consulate in Belgrade for this Friday morning. We will take the train in.

I read somewhere, on someone's blog (can't find it now, of course!) that there was some kind of commissary at or near the American consulate in Belgrade where one can purchase American groceries like Dr. Pepper, etc. Do any of you reading this know what I am talking about? Could you please leave me a comment with any info you have, like WHERE IS IT? I would love to visit this place while I am there.

Kum's Chosen!

2007-10-02T13:01:00.001+02:00

Well, our Kum's (best men) are chosen and our wedding will happen shortly. The next few weeks will be very busy for us.

First, we have to go to the Consulate in Belgrade to get some documents notarized so I will satisfy Serbian legal requirements in order to marry my love and have this be a legal marriage that will be recognized by the US as well.

Then we take those documents to City Hall in Novi Sad. A couple of days later, we will be free to set the date and marry.

This is all very exciting. It will be the first time I will go to Belgrade other than at the crack of dawn to catch a plane, or arriving at the airport at the end of an 18 hour plane ride. All I've seen of it so far is the airport and the highway!

The concept of Kum is very interesting. It's a little like what we in America call a best man, but it is so much more. This is what I have been told and gathered from the locals: The best man is someone who is there for you forever. Not just the day of the wedding. The best man can be a man or a woman and the bride has hers and the groom has his. (I found my Kum almost as soon as I got here, but my fiancé just decided on his this past week.) In the most ideal situations, your Kum is a friend you can depend on for life.

I have had people tell me stories of their Kum coming to the rescue in health emergencies and helping them celebrate their children's births and marriages. I haven't seen my Kuma (maid of honor) in probably 25 years and have only recently re-established contact by email with her. In America, people move around so much. My Kuma lives in Arizona now.

Please send us your good thoughts, OK?

Grape Picking in Karlovci

2007-10-02T12:09:00.000+02:00

On Saturday, we went to the "Grape Picking in Karlovci" festival held in Sremski Karlovci. This annual event is also the first festival I went to when I first came to Serbia in 2006. As a matter of fact, Saturday was the one year anniversary of my arrival!

As is the normal practice at these festivals, booths were set up for wine & rakija tasting, and for selling food, T-shirts, souvenirs, etc. There was also an area set aside for a carnival with rides for kids. I found these leather Serbian-style shoes particularly interesting:

Dancers representing the many ethnic groups in the area were present and performed on a large stage with live music. I had my picture taken with many of them. These young people are very talented and represent their country very well. Here's a couple of the pictures:
These are Serbian costumes:

These are Hungarian costumes:

Here's a group of Macedonian dancers getting ready to go onstage:

This is a group of Serbian dancers onstage:

But, this was my favorite costume and this is my favorite picture from the event. I call him "The Herder". I don't know where the costume comes from or what it means. If any of you out there know, please leave a comment! My fiancé was born and raised in Novi Sad, but doesn't always know the answers to my unending questions.

Several of the food booths were selling fresh roasted suckling pig. I just had to share this image with all of you. (PS - I wasn't the only one taking a picture of this!)

I'll post more pictures on my Flickr site later today. You can go there by clicking HERE It may take me a couple of days to get all of the labels on the pictures because I will have to get with my fiancé to identify some of the costumes and things.

Roasting Peppers - The Easy Way

2007-09-28T14:23:00.000+02:00

This is the time of the year when the locals buy bags of red peppers to roast and enjoy in the fall/winter months. A friend of ours told me an easy way to do this and I wanted to share the method with you. (We don't have a grill which is what lots of people use, so we needed another way.)

First, you just go and buy how ever much of fresh red paprika that you want. Wash them and dry them thoroughly and put them on a baking sheet or pan:

Turn your oven to it's highest heat and let it preheat. After it is ready, put the pan full of peppers inside and cook them until they are bubbly and cooked to where there is some black on them. My oven goes to 250C and it took about 20-30 min for my peppers. Don't open the oven during this process unless you must. Here's the finished product:

Now carefully remove the peppers from the oven and the baking sheet with tongs or something. Put them into a plastic bag, close it and let them cool. You'll have to pick them up with your hands to pull the skins off, so they really need to cool.
When they have cooled, they will look like this:

Now comes the fun part. Cut the stem of the pepper off and peel the skin away. It should come off rather easily, but if you need to, use a knife to help it along. You can keep the seeds, or discard them...whatever you like. You can keep the peppers whole (more authentic, I think) or cut them into slices. Here's what that process looks like:

For the final step, put your peppers into a bowl and add chopped fresh garlic, a little oil and vinegar and a little salt. Mix it all up and refrigerate it for a couple of hours to let it marinate. I like to refrigerate overnight and enjoy them the next day. As you can see, I like mine garlicy, too. No problem with vampires in our apartment!

These are great as a side dish, which is the way the locals have served them to me. I think they are fantastic on sandwiches or added to salads.

I don't know how long they will keep, as we eat them all in one day, but I would imagine it is best to eat them in a couple of days since they are fresh and have no preservatives.
Isvoljeti! Prijatno!

Shopping for Food in Novi Sad

2007-09-26T16:46:00.000+02:00

Last night we went to the grocery store. We go every 2 weeks after my love gets paid. We go to a store called "Alba Supermarket". It's very much like any medium sized grocery store in Louisiana, with a couple of exceptions:

In the produce section, you choose your fresh fruits and veggies, but you take them to a worker who weighs them and puts the info on the bag for you. These seem to be grown organically, or at least with minimum pesticides because they aren't the pictures of perfection that you get in US supermarkets. But they certainly look and taste fine. You can also by bulk dried beans, rice, nuts etc. in this area, but the worker has to bag and weigh it for you. Not a problem unless it is a busy Friday night, but that's the American in me, I guess. People I have seen just wait calmly.
Of course, you can also buy these things packaged in other areas of the store.

There is a section where you can buy fresh fish. By fresh fish I mean, the fish are swimming around in a big tank and you can pick the one you want and they fish it out for you with a small net. They also have packaged fresh fish and in the frozen food department you can buy frozen fish, octopus, squid, shrimp, etc...complete with heads, tails, etc. or breaded and ready to cook. See earlier rant about this here.

Anyway, the rest of the store is like in America. They have fresh meat-not a lot of beef in our Alba. I've only seen what we would call stew meat (used for goulash)ground beef but no steak (as if anyone could afford it). There is a lot of nice chicken and pork. A good selection of deli meats and cheeses, baked goods (but, I haven't seen fresh baked cookies-not that I need any of those) and prepared meats like rotisserie chicken fresh feta and similar cheeses, marinated olives, and lots of sausage (!). (Note to BettiM - they DO have cornflakes, several kinds in fact..and peanut butter.) The selection is plentiful, the store is clean, no funky smells... Just what you would expect in a nice store.

They are always restocking the shelves. We have been in there on probably every day of the week and workers always have flats and boxes of merchandise they are putting out.

Many times when we go on the weekend, in the juice, soda, pivo and wine area they just leave the packages of stock on the floor close to the shelf because people buy these so fast, it's the easiest way to keep up with demand.

I've met such nice people in the store, too. I always go with my fiancé, but when I am looking for something women need like something to wash my face with, or body lotion, etc. I've had to ask a stranger in the aisle, or a worker because he really has no clue...hahaha. As I have mentioned before, many of the young people speak english very well, so I just find a young woman and ask. They have always been very helpful and seem "tickled pink" (as we say in the South) to speak to me.

My love always buys chocolate bars and little yogurts with fruit for his little grandsons when we go to the store. Doesn't sound like much to an American like I used to be, but again, things here aren't easy for most people and this is a real treat for these little guys. He loves them very much and it pleases him to give them regularly what he rarely got as a child. Have I mentioned how wonderful he is lately?

There are some things that we prefer to buy in the fresh markets you can find all over town. There is one close to where my fiancé works and he goes to that one for fresh produce and "fish fingers" (fish sticks - only MUCH better because they are fresh and a little spicy - I LOVE spicy). He also buys some stuff for around the house there because it is cheaper (like cleaning cloths, batteries, etc.). Every dinar counts in this place.

We buy stuff like water,pivo, and juice at the little liquor store a couple of blocks down from us. We buy fresh brown eggs at the little store across the street, and bread from the bakery that is practically our neighbor.

As far as clothing, I haven't really needed to buy much here yet. I brought most of what I need with me. I have had to buy a couple of things and I bought them at one of the ubiquitous Chinese shops that are on every 10 blocks or so. Things there are cheap (price and quality) but for just a top to wear around, why not? There are tons of clothing and shoe stores all over town if you want to buy something and spend some real money, but that's not really an option or a need for me right now.

These little Chinese shops have clothing for men, women and kids. They have household things like dishes, towels, glasses. Some of the larger ones have some pretty neat Chinese trinkets. They are staffed and run by Chinese...some of them have a local working there to talk to customers, but really, the Chinese person just bags your purchase and takes your money, so a lot of conversation is not really necessary. When I go to the little one a few blocks from our home, I just look for what I need, or else by means of the universal language of hand signals and pointing, etc. she is able to understand what I want.

And of course, you can find EVERYTHING and ANYTHING at the flea market in Novi Sad.

Not quite as easy as just going to WalMart for everything, but a lot more interesting.

Pivo Festival in Čelarevo

2007-09-17T10:46:00.001+02:00

On Saturday night we went to the opening of the Pivo (Beer) Festival in Čelarevo. Čelarevo is the home of LAV (Lion) Beer. It's pretty good beer. Kind of strong, but I am a light beer person. (I know, many people think light beer is an abomination, but Coors and Miller light are what I drank in Louisiana, although I prefer wine.)
Anyway, the free beer flowed and the young people partied. And those of us who are a little older had a good time,too. I met the sweetest old man and his grandson who spoke perfect english. The grandson told me his name, but there is no way I can pronounce it...he said his nickname is "Bottle"...that I can handle. Here's a picture of us:

He recently graduated from university with a degree in Computer Information Systems which is the same thing that my daughter is studying. He is 23 and she is 22...small world. He was working the festival, serving free beer.

There was music and dancing at the festival on a very large stage. There was also a beer drinking contest for the young men. Here's a picture of that:

There were also men roasting beef for the crowd to enjoy..free, so all in all the villagers were having a great time. There were rides and game booths for the kids and lots of laughter as villagers greeted each other and friends from other places. The buses that go between the towns and villages arrived frequently unloading even more people.

Here's a picture of my love with his sister and his nephew:

He really is the cutest thing....

Visit to Čelarevo in Vojvodina, Serbia

2007-09-17T09:20:00.000+02:00

On Friday we went to visit my love's sister and brother in Čelarevo. They each have a little house on the Danube there. These little houses are compact, but very comfortable. His brother bought his and fixed it up as nice as any home in town.

The bottom floor of most of these houses has a large kitchen with a table for eating indoors and a bathroom. There is a large front porch where they usually have another table so they can eat outside, which is what they do during the nice weather.

There are stairs leading up to the second floor where there is a nice sleeping area, with a television and in some cases, another bathroom. They also have terraces up on this floor.

Here's a picture of his brother's house on the River:

In the kitchens of most of these homes is a wood burning stove like this one:

I am amazed and impressed at what they are able to cook on these stoves. They also do a lot of cooking outside. Some have grills, others use the tripod with a cooking pot method. When we were there, his brother-in-law made fish soup (regional specialty) outside on a tripod cooker.

When lunch was served, we had 2 courses. The first was the soup served with egg noodles. You put the noodles in your bowl and pour the rich fish stock over them. You add some Pavlaka if you like and stir it up. (Pavlaka is like sour cream...yummy, but fattening of course!) When you have your fill of that, you put some of the fish in your bowl and eat it with your fingers. The fish is basically the whole gutted fish sans the head. So, you pull off the fins and stuff and try not to eat any bones! His sister also made some delicious paprika on the side. And no meal is complete without bread - hleb.

Here is that course:

After I was stuffed with that, they brought out the fried fish. They fry with fat. They are quick to tell you that oil is "not natural" and gums up your blood. Fat, they say is "natural" and flows right on through. Anyway, I just ate a little. It was delicious. Here's the fried fish:

Before eating, we all had a little "Stomaklija"..a rakija (brandy) with herbs that is supposed to be good for your stomach. This is another example of the cultural-medical wisdom here. Very interesting. The drink was good and it stimulated the appetite not a problem for me, unfortunately :^( Here's a picture of the bottle...note the obligatory ashtray.

During the meal, though we did not have any drink. It's one of those things here. Most of the time, no drink is served at a meal, not even water. After you eat, beer, vino, rakija, everything is offered to you. My love says this is common.

The water on the river was up, but it crested on Sunday and will begin to go down. I took some pictures of a beautiful pair of swans that swam right up to where we were...very comfortable with the people. My love's sister says she gives them some bread and they like that. Here they are:

Sunshine in the Rain

2007-09-11T10:39:00.000+02:00

Today my son wrote me an email and told me that he wants to have a relationship with me again. He has been having a hard time adjusting...to school and to life with just his Dad, as his sister has moved out. He has had some problems and I have wanted to help, but couldn't.

This is one of the happiest days of my life. I didn't think he would ever speak to me again other than to tell me that he hated me. He sent me a picture of him and a song. He and I love music and he knows I like to listen to some of the same things he does.

My son and I have always been so close. Leaving him was the hardest thing of all. I'm not going to go into all the details. Just that my divorce has been hard on my kids and it is all my fault.

Dwelling on the guilt is something I do all of the time, and I really must let it go. Having him email me the past two days has done so much to help me that I can't really express it.

I look forward to the healing for him and for me. I feel like for the first time in many years, my prayers are being heard. This is not a religious blog, nor am I a religious person anymore, but I am grateful.

Visit To Šen Winery - Ilok, Croatia

2007-09-11T10:26:00.000+02:00

We returned to the winery of Rudolph Šen in Ilok. He had some wonderful rose wine as well as his very nice, dry white.

We visited about an hour with this wonderful man and he took a few pictures with us.

He spoke to us about his life (he's 77) as we tasted wine and shared our stories. Once again, here is someone who we really didn't know other than as wine customers, and now we are friends.

Trip to Budva/Petrovac, Montenegro

2007-09-07T11:48:00.000+02:00

We just returned from one week in beautiful Budva, Montenegro on the Adriatic. My fiance and I were there for the World Martial Arts Festival.

We stayed at the Slovenska Plaza, which is a resort consisting of many "mini" hotels. It is right there at the beach. There were tourists from many countries. Hearing all of the languages being spoken made me think of the Tower of Babel story from the bible. English, German, Serb, Macedonian, Russian, Korean, French...
The water was cold like ice! But, the water was clear and blue and the beach was nice with sand and small pebbles. I am used to the mud of a lake bottom where your feet sink into the goo, so I loved it. But, not being a "nature girl" I spent most of my time in one of the two pools there at Slovenska Plaza. They used fresh seawater in the pool and it too was freezing, but refreshing.

On our last night, we went to Petrovac, another village on the Adriatic and stayed at the Hotel Palas. The accomodations were even better than at Budva. Our room had a terrace, air conditioning, TV and a mini fridge and we had a beautiful view:

The little island on the right has a little Orthodox church on the top of it!

The weather turned stormy and cold that night, so we took the train back home to Novi Sad.

Prices were very reasonable. I think for most Americans, English, etc. it would be considered cheap to stay in Budva or Petrovac. I noted some prices:
Large Pivo 1.5 Euro
Hamburger or other sandwich 1.50 Euro
Room in hotel 55 Euro per night
(This included a full buffet breakfast and dinner, with meat, salad, bread, dessert, everything. And the food was good. The hotel in Petrovac, owned by some French investors even served white or red wine with dinner.)

Parasailing, boat tours, fishing expeditions, carnival rides for the kids...all was available from about 3 Euro and up. And of course, souvenirs of all kinds were available.

There were the usual little markets conveniently located so that you could buy juice, fruit, whatever you wanted at prices that were close to what we pay here in Novi Sad.

Vojvodina Ethnic Festival of Food and Music

2007-08-27T11:44:00.000+02:00

This Saturday we went to the Vojvodina Cultural Festival of Food and Music here in Novi Sad. There are about 40 different ethnic groups living peacefully together in Vojvodina. The festival was held down at the Strand beach on the Danube River. The Strand beach is very popular with the locals for swimming, sunning and hanging out.

This event had booths set up for people to sell wine, pivo, rakija, kobasica,kolač and other foods from this area. Others sold handcrafted items like embroidered table cloths and painted items. People walked around in swimsuits, shorts, capri pants...all kinds of summer clothes and everyone had a good time.

We walked around, tasting and sampling the food and had a pivo sitting at a table in the shade with a couple who were kind enough to share their table with us. While we were looking at everything, we met the president of the Executive Council of the Autonomous Province of Vojvodina (President of the Vojvodina Government), Bojan Pajtič and he was kind enough to have his picture made with me.

There was a large stage where live music was performed by many ethnic groups. There were also dancers in colorful costumes:

It was a very hot day, but with the shady areas scattered throughout the festival site and the location of the beach just steps away, it turned out to be very comfortable.

One of the things I love about this place is these wonderful festivals that occur almost every couple of weeks!

Birthday Celebration Details

2007-08-16T10:23:00.000+02:00

As I mentioned in my last post, my love recently celebrated his birthday. Birthdays in Novi Sad are an affair for family and friends just as they were in my home state of Louisiana. The difference? Here birthdays are also for adults.

Back in Louisiana, birthdays were mainly for kids. We take them to McDonald's, or the skating rink, or whatever business caters to kids birthdays with a bunch of their friends. Or, we'd have a party at home with their friends and cake and ice cream. When the kids were small grandparents would come, too.

For adults, usually the husband and wife go out to dinner at a nice restaurant and maybe a movie. If you are dating someone, same thing. If you are a young adult, usually you do have a party with friends.

Here in Novi Sad, my love invited his closest friends and his daughter and her family over and we ate, drank, talked, joked and listened to music. He tends to like the traditional music of Vojvodina and US music from the 50's and 60's. We also listened to some of my CD's. I like all kinds of music, so for his guests we listened to some Trisha Yearwood, Lionel Ritchie, Fleetwood Mac...easy listening. They like their music a little louder than I do, but they speak loudly so they can still hear each other over it!

I have posted before about how when people here are speaking they can get rather loud. If you didn't know better, you would think they were mad at each other. My love told me a story of one time one of his neighbors visited with a mutual friend and after several rakija's they got pretty loud. His son-in-law (who lives in the building) came to the door concerned that they were fighting! He said they all laughed and invited him in to join them.

To me, this is just another example of the zest for life that these people have. It's like everything they do, they do with vigor. It can be overwhelming sometimes, but it is also endearing.

The guests seemed to like my music. I know they are familiar with American music. The whole world is. There are many radio stations here in Novi Sad and I can always find several playing American music, but I like the traditional music as well.

The little roasted pig was a hit. They eat everything here. Nothing is wasted. The pig's tail, ears, etc. were all consumed. The meat was very good, roasted perfectly.

The one major disappointment was my camera. It has been acting up lately and did not cooperate for me to take pictures. I think I had some bad batteries, because it is working now that I have replaced them.

Srećan Rođendan! (Happy Birthday!)

2007-08-11T12:14:00.000+02:00

This is a busy weekend for us.

Tonight we celebrate my love's birthday. We have invited friends over to our apartment and we have a half of a roasted pig cooking at the corner pekara to eat with them.
Must run now and go buy mineral water and pivo which we will serve in addition to beli vino.

Tomorrow we go to Čelarevo to visit family and celebrate the 15th anniversary of my love's brother and his girlfriend. This will be another big party with lots of food and laughter.

I will have pictures of these events and tell about how they celebrate birthdays (birzdays..haha) in my next post.

The Cows Come Home to Novi Sad

2007-08-04T10:18:00.000+02:00

Last year in the town center, Novi Sad had an exhibition of painted horses. They were very beautiful. This year, the town is featuring painted cows. The cows are all the same, but the painting is done by different artists. The people here seem to love them as much as I do. People have their pictures made near them and children seem drawn to them.

I have uploaded pictures of them to my Flickr account. Here is the link: http://www.flickr.com/photos/novisadnewbie/

You can also see pictures of some of last year's horses there.

As I walked through the town the other day, the weather was comfortable and people were out, sitting in the little cafes spread throughout the center of town. My love says that many people are on vacation at this time of the year and if they cannot go to the sea (Greece, Montenegro or Macedonia) they will enjoy the cafes of Novi Sad.
We stopped and had an icy cold beer at JOE'S, which is close to where my love works.
Živali!

Souvenir Shop

2007-07-28T16:39:00.000+02:00

While walking in town the other day, I found the cutest little souvenir shop. This one sells handpainted and handcrafted things...not the usual T-shirts. Shown are some painted bottles.
It's called the "Prestige Suveniri Juvelir" (Souvenir and Jeweler) in the town centre area. The owner was friendly and proud to show me around the shop.

Cheese and cheesiness

2007-07-24T08:48:00.000+02:00

On the bright side, I found some cheese that is close enough to Cheddar that I think I will be able to use it as a substitute in cheese enchiladas and macaroni and cheese. It is called "Trappist" cheese. We went to visit our neighbors on Friday and had a wonderful, cheesy lunch with them. The wife made what was basically macaroni and cheese with little chunks of chicken and just a touch of beef. It was delicious and soul-satisfying. It was made with this cheese, which is available in all of the shops I have been to. It's mild and light yellow. I don't think it is expensive...wait, what am I saying? To most people here, it's ALL expensive.

Speaking of markets and shops here that sell food. As I have mentioned before people here don't make a lot of money. A $400-500 a month paycheck is pretty good. So....

1. Why do they sell shrimp and other expensive seafood with all of the stuff you can't eat? Like the heads, eyes, antennas, etc? And yes, I know people here eat the fish heads...I am talking about the things no one eats.

2. Why, when you go to the local Police Station to get your license plate, drivers license, visa, passport, etc. do they CHARGE you for the form that you must have? I can see charging for the service, but for the frickin' form????

3. Why don't they either clean up the water so that people are comfortable drinking it (and then don't have to buy water at 70-80 dinars for 5 liters - about $35 a month, just for WATER) or if it is clean and safe, spend a little money on a campaign to inform the public?

4. Vojvodina is the bread basket of Serbia. So, why don't these good people get a break on prices of fruits, vegetables and meat? They raise and farm the stuff, but they pay the same as the rest of the country.

That's my rant. I don't want to be political. I don't begin to understand the politics here. I have no right to tell anyone else how to live, but I see these things and they seem so unfair. The people that I have met here will give you the shirt off of their backs...what little they have, they will share with you. I just wish they could get a few breaks, y'know?

Homesick and more

2007-07-24T08:20:00.001+02:00

Homesickness is rearing it's very ugly head right now. I miss my Mom and Dad. I miss my kids, even though I know if I was at home, they still wouldn't speak to me. I miss America and everyday life there. By early next year, I will be back, but for now....

The heat is not helping. It's been over 100F everyday for so long that it is hard to remember that week of cool temps and afternoon showers not so long ago. Evidently though, this is unusually hot for this time of year and this place. I don't know why that makes me feel a little better. It doesn't bring the temperature down any.

I am lonely. My love works, which is of course necessary and understandable. But, when he comes home I WANT TO TALK....about anything and nothing. But, this communication problem is always there. I am not a patient person. I get frustrated. His English speaking is ok, but his comprehension when I am talking to him is not so good. SO, he either nods and smiles (first clue that he doesn't understand) or he starts talking about something else before I have finished my thought and so the sirens and bells start going off in my head.

That's one thing I have noticed with a lot of people here. They talk over each other and don't seem to listen too well when others are talking. A culture thing, I guess.

And people here LOVE their TV. When we go and visit friends, the damn thing is usually on. When my love is at home, the TV is on. Needless to say, any talking is done during commercials - reklam.

When I was in America, I didn't care for the TV shows. I watched Netflix films mostly if the TV was on. But, it didn't get turned on until after supper and then was only on until the movie was over.

I am afraid, unsure and hoping this weather breaks soon for my mental health and well being.

It's Hot!

2007-07-18T15:17:00.000+02:00

This week has been very hot. Today it is 41C/105F...holy crap, is that right???? Yeah, the temperature converter doesn't lie.

The television reporters are doing stories about the heat. Showing people drinking water, buying water, pouring water over their heads. Just like in America, they warn of the impending doom of mankind.

I can relate.

I am an "air-conditioned baby". In Louisiana, we have weather just like this...same heat, same humidity. But, everything is air conditioned. When you are outside, it is usually for a short period of time, or you are at the pool.

We have a small rotating fan in the apartment. We live on the top floor of our building. Heat rises.

It is 36C/97F in here right now. OMG. Solution? There is none. I just wear the minimum of clothing and shower about every hour. Stay still, very still. And drink lots of water...

Most evenings we go fishing on the Danube and stay there for a couple of hours. That helps. On the weekend, we often go visit family on the Danube in Čelarevo. But during the heat of the day, here in town, the last place to be is outside.

We expect about 6 more weeks of heat. There will be days when the highs will only be 34C/93F. I look forward to the beautiful, cool fall days of October that I remember from last year.

Mexican Feast

2007-07-13T14:50:00.000+02:00

Last night I cooked Mexican food for our neighbors. I couldn't believe how well it turned out, considering I can't find cheddar cheese here. Back home, I wouldn't even attempt Mexican food without it. But, I had a major craving for Mexican and our neighbor had asked me what to do with the tortillas he had seen at the market.

This was the menu:
Chicken Enchiladas with Sour Cream Sauce
Refried Beans
Mexican Rice

Every bit of it was homemade...nothing from a can. Wow. And it was fun. Cooking in our tiny kitchen was a bit of a challenge, though. I had 3 of 4 burners going at one time.

It was interesting the substitutions I made. (I had brought a large container of chili powder with me when I came here...don't really know why, but at the time it seemed like a good idea.) The tortillas were flour, I prefer corn, but they only had the flour kind. Couldn't find Monterrey Jack, so I used a little "Pizza Sir"...mozzarella cheese...it's fairly bland and melted beautifully. I just wanted a little cheese to hold the chicken and other stuff together in the enchilada and a little to put on top. I used the beans they have here and refried them with a little oil and onion and garlic and chili powder. I don't know exactly what kind of bean they are. Pretty much like pinto beans. I can't find green bell pepper here to put in the enchiladas and rice, so I used some mild paprikas instead since green bell peppers are mild...worked out fine.

I made a homemade salsa from tomatoes, onions, garlic, hot paprika (peppers), a little oregano, crushed coriander, salt, pepper and a little oil. I made it the day before and it was great as a garnish on the enchiladas with the sour cream on top. If I could have found some tortilla chips, I would have made more for a dip. The fresh tomatoes and other vegetables here are unbelievably delicious!

The funniest part of all was when I finished everything, I thought "uh oh, it doesn't look right, I don't think it will be good." But, I was committed, we had nothing else prepared and our neighbors were at the door.

It turned out well. They LOVED it. You can tell someone here likes it when they really eat. The wife had 2 helpings and her husband had 3! My love had 2 helpings also, although he is so sweet that he will eat anything I cook.

I made chicken and sausage jambalaya when I first came here for some friends and take my word for it...they DIDN'T like it. They ate only one tiny helping to be polite. We had to eat that stuff for days because you just don't throw food away here. And that's ok.

Now my love has two dishes he loves and wants me to cook for everyone...my "American" pizza with mushrooms and sausage and now my Mexican feast. We went for a drink with other friends afterwards (these late nights are killing me) and he was telling them about it and inviting them over for dinner soon to try it!

Wait A Minute

2007-07-05T11:40:00.000+02:00

I've been here for a while and now things are beginning to get a little clearer. One thing that has been brought home to me lately is that some people here think I am a RICH American. Omigod...funny.

For some reason (I don't know...maybe TV, movies???) some people think I had a big home back in Louisiana (try about 1600 sq. ft. asbestos shingled 3 bdr. 1 bath), big fancy car (2001 Toyota), and lots of money (family business, kid in college, lots of debt).

What I did own is now food for lawyers in my divorce and will likely be sold to pay towards my share of child support. My clothes have been given to Goodwill. My personal books, music, pictures...the things that I took for granted are gone. My Mom was able to grab a few bags of my best clothes for me but shipping them here from Texas would cost more than they are worth.

I know that these things are more than most average Serbians can claim. I'm not going to apologize for that. But, rich? Hardly. I was middle class in America. That means I had stuff, courtesy of credit cards and debt. I worked hard to get the things I had. My EX and I had 20+ yr. old furniture and our house needed lots of "fixing up".

The reason I bring this up is because of this wrong impression, these people seem to think that I should be able to buy whatever they are selling. We should be able to lend money to them...whatever. We live on my fiance's salary which is basically the same small salary that everyone else gets. How do I know this? Because, EVERYONE I have met here who works has told me what his/her salary is in our first conversation.

I came here with a few hundred dollars. That's all I have to my name. I don't have a job. All I own now came with me in 2 suitcases and one carry on bag.

I try not to lump all Serbians into one stereotype - I know they are individuals. I wish people here would do the same for Americans.

Foods I Miss

2007-07-04T17:23:00.000+02:00

Today is the 4th of July. The first one I have ever spent away from the US, and I miss the celebrations, the food and of course, my family.

However, I can't really dwell on that.

Instead, I am thinking of some of the foods that I miss from "back home". While I love the food here in Novi Sad - sarma, fish stew, goulash, etc., I am craving the following dishes (in no particular order):

1. A big thick Whataburger hamburger and fries. Hell, I'd even go the "whole hog" and get it with cheese. Yes, I know there is a McDonald's here in Novi Sad, but I hated that crap in the US and I still don't want it.

2. Micheal Angelo's frozen vegetable lasagne. This is so good. You put a little extra mozzarella on the top and "zap" it in the microwave.

3. A big box of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese. Wow, I really am pitiful. Not exactly gourmet stuff.

4. I am from Louisiana, so of course boiled crawfish must be included in this wish list. With new potatoes and corn on the cob cooked in with the crawdaddies.

5. Some California Rose wine. I really love this, but rose here is expensive and rare. Plenty of good and cheap whites and reds, but not much in blush or rose.

6. Some Bar-B-Q ... anything. Pork ribs, chicken leg quarters, sausage...I'm not picky.

Well, I think that is plenty for now. I really need to stop thinking about it and just go enjoy my day.

Happy 4th to anyone who is American and might be reading this blog today.

Saturday Weddings

2007-06-23T14:38:00.000+02:00

It's a little after 2:30 in the afternoon on a Saturday and I hear outside my window cars going by and horns honking. I know without looking that someone else has married today.
People here drive their cars, in a line (like we in the US do for funerals) with the lights on, horns honking and flying large Serbian flags out of the window. The car carrying the bride and groom is usually decorated with white ribbon, etc. like the cars of bridal parties in the US. Those of us walking on the street smile and wave to them. It is a happy time for all.

Problems Back Home

2007-06-21T11:34:00.000+02:00

I called my Dad for Father's Day and got some upsetting news. My Mom had another "mini-stroke" last week. These are times when she goes totally blank. Can't remember where she has been, what she has been doing. She had gone to the Gynecologist with my daughter and evidently "woke up" not knowing what had happened. She told me she had her doctor's new RX's in her purse and everything, but couldn't remember anything.

I wrote my daughter an email asking for more information. She was there, she could help me to understand what goes on when this happens. Since Mom doesn't want to worry me, she gives only the minimum of info, but I have received no answer, no acknowledgment of my email...nothing. The "freeze" continues.

My brother, having heard that I spoke to Mom and Dad DID send me an email telling me that he thinks this is Mom's reaction to stress. He says my Mom's regular doctor told her to get some psychiatric counseling. My Dad has had some health problems the last few years and she worries about that and one of her sisters with whom she had reconnected after many years died of breast cancer. And, of course....last but NOT LEAST - STRESS caused by ME. Great.

Everything bad that happens in my family from now on will, I suppose, be my fault.

I am very worried. I don't have the money to just fly home and visit and then return. Even if I did, it will mess up my proof of residency that I am establishing so that I can marry my fiance here and then return to America. I want to be closer to my family, things like this just reinforce that desire. I don't think it will matter to my kids, but I know it will to my parents.

So, I worry, feel guilty, and bask in the glow of the hate coming my way from my kids. And how is your day?

Stomach Virus From Hell

2007-06-14T11:05:00.000+02:00

I've been out of it for two days and now my love is sick from some kind of stomach virus from hell. Luckily, our doctor has given his advice on what to do and what to take and I feel better today, at least I am out of bed and have showered.

My love just returned from work and is sleeping. I knew when he awoke last night and had to call on the porcelain telephone that this was not good. Now, it is my turn to care for him. He has been my lifeline that past few days.

Gotta go....

Bean Festival in Temerin

2007-06-05T12:05:00.000+02:00

This past weekend we attended the "Pasulj i Jada" in Temerin, Vojvodina. Over 100 cooks participated in this contest to cook the best beans. They worked in teams and represented various firms and groups. Most of the ones I saw were men and the women helped keep the food and drink flowing to the guests at each tent. The winning group were our friends from Novi Sad...BRAVO!

Naturally, there was music and dancing in the large grassy area in the middle of the festival site. Here's a picture of some kids who entertained the crowd:

Native crafts were sold as well, beautiful laces, embroidery, handmade jewelry (made from beans), paintings, cotton rugs and purses and delicious wines from Temerin.

There were red, white and rose wines, as well as a wine made from jabuka (apples).
I met lots of very friendly people who were happy to supply me with all of the food and wine I could possibly drink. I posed for pictures with vintners, cooks and locals dressed in costume. Here's a great picture of me with a local vintner who had some fabulous white wine:

An Evening Out

2007-06-05T11:53:00.000+02:00

Recently, we went out to eat at the Fontana Restaurant in Novi Sad. It is located in the town center area. Delicious food and wonderful Cerni (Red)Vino. I had the chicken...a huge piece of chicken breast, cooked and covered with cheese, accompanied with fried potatoes and a tasty salad:

While we were there, a young couple was holding their wedding reception. As we ate, the wedding cake passed by and I took a quick photo:

The young couple had a Roma band playing. There were several horns and a drummer. The music was very interesting and our host, the owner's son, took me to the room where the reception was being held and I was able to watch and listen for a few minutes. The people were dancing and having a wonderful time.

Working Hard For Me

2007-05-12T12:38:00.000+02:00

It's been quite awhile since my last post. Things are much better. Upon reflection I see that I have been very hard to live with. Because of the circumstances with my kids, the dark cloud of depression has been following me around.

I know that my constant sadness, anger and tears would be hard for anyone to deal with, but especially for my love who is really a happy person. It seems to me that people here (at least the ones I have met) are very good at hiding any unpleasant emotions...at least around outsiders. I haven't been very good at doing that.

Last weekend things came to a head and we nearly broke up. It was really my fault. I was in the midst of a major "pity party" and I was looking to compound my misery. I was relentless in my aggressiveness towards my love, pushing him to tell me to leave, trying everything to make him say the things that would break my heart so that I could feel even worse...justified that I was a bad person who didn't deserve happiness or love anymore because of what I had "done"....it's complex, but I guess I felt like I need to be punished. No one can punish me better than I can punish myself.
Luckily, my love and I sat and talked and we were able to get through it. But, it was too close for comfort.
Afterwards, I spent some time in introspection and realized what was going on, what I was doing.

I am a strong person. I know that I can get through all of this stuff. I know what I want and I want this person in my life. I am not going to let others make my life miserable and I am not going to make myself miserable. I have done all I can do right now to make contact with my kids and if they don't want to forgive or have any contact with me...so be it. I can't change them, only time and their hearts can change. Beating myself up about it and trashing this relationship is not going to help anyone.

My old life is over and my new one is beginning. This is my future and I am glad for it. I feel so much better now because I have made these hard realizations about myself. I have suffered from depression in the past and that hell is NOT somewhere that I am willing to go again. I am in charge of my moods, my life and my future. I understand that now.

Culture Clash

2007-04-20T08:04:00.000+02:00

I was reading another person's blog the other day about how some of the people in this part of the world get so loud when they speak to each other that it sounds as if they are arguing, even though they are not. That they have alot of passion in their lives and can get excited and overwrought when they speak.

I am seeing this in my own relationship. Our relationship is still fairly new. I am under some stress because since I left America to come here, my kids are angry and don't speak to me. This is hard, obviously.

And, I am sure that having me here in his small apartment 24/7 is stressful for my love. I know that the economic impact is a factor as well. We are not wealthy. Middle class is what I would say, maybe even lower middle class. I am not working at this time...can't speak the language. But, I am very frugal, happy with whatever we cook, and haven't spent a dinar on myself since I have known him.

Top that off with the fact that his English is self taught and he is still learning and that my Serbian is at the level of a 2 year old...if that good. Sometimes we just don't understand each other. Or, we think we do and boy are we wrong!

My love has lived on his own for a very long time. He is set in his ways. He is very impulsive and seems to have very little empathy for my very real sadness. He thinks I should be strong and tells me that everything will be OK. That may well be, but as a woman, sometimes a good cry is called for. His idea of life is to laugh and joke all of the time. I like laughing, too, but sometimes I can't find anything to laugh about.

When he takes the time to really listen to me, he gives me very good advice and makes me feel much better. It's just that often he'll just say "what is wrong now?" or, "why are you nervous?" Not exactly welcoming conversation starters.

Part of me knows that I need to just deal with my problems on my own and that I need to be strong for him and for me. And I am not the most patient of people. I get upset easily right now as well.

Part of me knows that he says things this way because those are the only words he knows to say and it really is not his fault that they sound harsh to me. I understand from trying to learn Serbian that when I learn a phrase I want to use it and don't really want to learn one that might be a little more fitting or finessed.
Maybe he learned "what is wrong now?" and didn't learn "I love you, baby...tell me what is wrong"... and saying someone is "nervous" seems to be the way they describe being under stress, which I am.

Anyway, when we get into an argument, disagreement, or misunderstanding he can be loud and angry towards me...at least it sounds that way. Maybe this is part of that passion in life stuff. I don't know. He is quick to anger, but also quick to forgive and recover when it is out of his system. I am not saying he would hurt me physically. Not at all. But, the emotional distress I feel is very real.

I have no one that I can talk to about this. Only you, and I don't think there really are any of "you" out there reading this. I am writing this blog for myself today.

Easter Celebrations

2007-04-13T09:41:00.000+02:00

This year both Catholic and Orthodox celebrated Easter on the same day. The way that my love and his family and friends celebrated Easter was very lovely:

We prepared the traditional Easter breakfast meal this year to be eaten at the home of his daughter and her family who live in the same building that we do. Because the shops are closed on Sunday...all of them, evidently..we had to buy everything we would need until Monday. That meant extra bread and bottled water (which we usually buy daily)and anything we would need for the breakfast and lunch on Sunday. This is kind of hard to do when you usually just run out and get things as you need them.

On Saturday night, we cooked (boiled) a beautifully lean smoked ham with some sausages and also some boiled eggs in with this (for added flavor - the eggs that is). I made some American style deviled eggs for them to taste as well. We also boiled some eggs to dye and decorate for his grandchildren...just as we do in America. There was alot of activity that night...many cooking pots going at once, his daughter coming by to bring us some vinegar for the egg dyeing and to look at what my love had bought for the children's Easter...it was fun.

Sunday morning we called friends and family to wish them a Happy Easter and to proclaim "Christ is Risen!". Then, we took all of the food downstairs to his daughter's apartment and ate with them. Bread, salad, the meat, eggs, vino, pivo...food was plentiful and very good. His daughter provided two delicious cakes for desert.

The children had lots of chocolate and candy in their baskets, just like in America. It is now almost a week later and they still have chocolate..hahahha.

The eldest grandson made me a little egg holder at school and presented me with a very pretty egg to save until next year. As long as the egg does not get damaged, it is kept out in the home for "good luck".

After breakfast and a very nice visit (both his daughter and son-in-law speak English), we came back to our apartment to rest and prepare lunch. Our plan was to go back downstairs and eat with them. However, the doorbell began to ring and eventually we had 6 guests arrive! All were family and friends and we sat and laughed and joked and drank a little vino. I didn't think that many people could fit in our little attic apartment space, but they did and it was very nice.

One thing they do here is everyone gets a boiled egg and you tap your egg (top or bottom) against another person's egg (top or bottom)...if yours cracks, you lose and the other person taps the next person's egg...and on it goes. So, here we were, all adults doing this...it was funny.

Everyone left after a few hours and we went on downstairs and ate what we had prepared for lunch and visited a little while. Then we came home and watched a little TV before calling it a day.

Overall, a very relaxing, family oriented day.

Litter - Not Just An American Problem

2007-03-28T10:57:00.000+02:00

What struck me the most about the town of Ilok is how clean it is. There was not the ubiquitous litter everywhere. I saw one bottle of soda on the ground next to a school playground. Could have been left that morning before school. It didn't look like it had been there very long. Obviously these people have pride in their town and either don't litter, or employ people to clean it up. In the park I saw many trash receptacles.

I am not trying to be critical , but the litter in the other places I have been to and in Novi Sad is disheartening to me. Along with the endless graffitti, it speaks to me of people who don't feel an ownership in their surroundings. It puzzles me as people are always telling me how proud they are of the clean air, fresh food, etc. Anyway, hopefully, education of the young against littering should eventually help on this. I sure hope so. This area has so much to offer for tourists, but the litter has to be cleaned up and stopped.

Visit to Ilok

2007-03-28T10:16:00.000+02:00

Yesterday we took a day trip to Ilok, the nearest village in Croatia.

We caught a 6 am bus over and arrived shortly after 7. We quickly finished the business that brought us there and had several hours before we had to return, so we changed some money in the menjacnica (exchange) so that we could get some coffee, etc.

The man working there was so friendly...I joked that he should be employed by the local tourist bureau. He answered all of our questions...about the town, where to get good coffee, where to catch the return bus to Novi Sad.

We walked a little ways down the block to the coffee bar. We had wonderful expresso for 2 Kuna each. The woman working the bar was also friendly and we passed a comfortable half hour there. Also, the bathroom was so clean. Softest paper I have experienced since coming to Eastern Europe..hahaha.

Also, the bathroom was unisex, which is not uncommon here. You walk in a door marked Toilette and on the left is a stall with a picture for women and on the right is one for men. There is a common sink area. In this particular one, against one wall are urinals...fortunately there were no men in there when I came in. I think I would faint if I walked in and some man was in there urinating! I'm not saying I would be fearful, just shocked! I see where talk of the Equal Rights Amendment - ERA is coming up again in America. This was the old bugaboo when I was growing up..."unisex toilettes would result".

We decided to walk over to a local Vintner and buy some Croatian wine. Wine from Ilok is famous and served in many fine restaurants and even in the court of Queen Elizabeth II. We had purchased wine from this local man in the past.

On the way to his home, we walked up a hill to a little park and explored it. In doing so we found a 13th century fortress with walls covering quite an expanse of area. In the area around it is another park with various monuments and statuary. I took many pictures of the fortress and park, one of which I am posting here.

We also visited the Church of St. Ivan Kapistrano (St. Juan of Capistrano in the US). The Church is undergoing renovation, but the workers allowed us to walk through and look. It was absolutely beautiful. Very ornate with two side altars. The main altar had a reliquary, but I could not get really close to see due to the scaffolding and work being done around it. However, I am posting a photo of it.

When we arrived at the Vintner, he was very welcoming. He took us down into the winery and I took photos. This is a pretty big family business. I saw about 10 vats. It was all very clean. I had my picture taken with him and we promised to return on our next trip to Ilok.

We still had some time, so we slowly walked back to the cafe and had some of the local pivo (beer). There are several from Croatia and we tried Osjecko. It was very good. Crisp and light tasting and not sweet. Some of the beer I have had in this area tastes kind of sweet. I don't particulary like them. The waitress brought us some kikiriki (peanuts) and we just relaxed and enjoyed beer and conversation.

Soon it was time to leave, so we walked out and caught the return bus to Novi Sad. We will definitely return soon and picnic in that park by the fortress.

Sunday at the Flea Market

2007-03-26T12:47:00.000+02:00

Yesterday we went to the big flea market here in Novi Sad. It was a beautiful, sunny day and it seemed as if everyone was there. We just hopped on the bus by our apartment, made a quick transfer in the center of town and got off the bus right at the entrance to the flea market.

At this flea market, you can buy everything! Cars, spices, household goods, fresh fruits and vegetables, clothing, shoes, birds, puppies, TV antennas...everything. Many people seemed to be getting ready for fishing...those stands were really busy selling rods and reels, lures, and other supplies.

There is a section where you can buy used things...stuff alot like a US garage sale would have....old books, grandma's old china, etc. It was funny to see all these old LP's from the 70's and 80's. Many of the people I have met here have phonograph record players in their homes, so there is a market for them, I suppose.

When we walked in to the flea market, I could smell the fresh rattan from a vendor who was selling rattan tables and chairs and beautiful baskets. Easter is coming soon and this year the Orthodox holiday and the Catholic holiday are on the same day, so some of the baskets had an Easter basket theme. My friends tell me that children here celebrate Easter much the same as in the US.

We passed an area where food vendors sold sandwiches, coffee and other drinks. There was also grilled food available. Everything smelled very good.

As we left the flea market, an older man played his violin and people dropped a few coins in his empty case. His wife sat nearby and just listened.

As we walked through the market, my companions saw friends and everyone stopped to say "dobar dan" (good day) and to speak for a few minutes before continuing on their way.

It is a great way to spend a Sunday, even if all you do is just "window shop".

Ritzy Hotel

2007-03-15T07:54:00.000+01:00

Last night we went to visit friends. This couple lives near a very nice hotel, newly renovated into a 5 star facility. It is called the Hotel Park. The woman and I walked over to the hotel so that I could see it.

Wow...just wow. In the midst of this little neighborhood, this hotel stands out like Shangri La. It had a beautiful fountain lit with colored lights on the side we entered. We went into the hotel to check out the fitness center.

I belonged to a very nice fitness center affiliated with a very large hospital in the city that I come from in the US, but it was nothing like this. I have visited casinos in Las Vegas that have beautiful spa facilities, but still, nothing like this. Everything was clean, beautiful and first class. Of course, I'm sure it is beyond the financial resources of most of the people in this area, but there were plenty of young people there, working out, dancing, talking, coming and going.

I can only imagine how nice the rooms are.

Visit to Montenegro

2007-03-15T07:29:00.000+01:00

This past weekend we took a short business trip to Montenegro's capital, Podgorica. Coming in to the city on the train I was excited to see beautiful mountains and little streams running through the countryside. Very beautiful. This photo was taken from the train window.

The train was fairly old, but the sleeping compartment was comfortable. It was tiny, but our party was able to be alone in the room. We had a little pivo (beer) with us to toast the trip and we joked and laughed as people here love to do for a little while before going to sleep. I actually slept a little while on this train, something I have never done on a train in the US.

It was a bright sunny day when we arrived and the air smelled fresh and clean. Our host met us and took us to our small but friendly hotel. Because I am an American, I was treated like royalty by our host. I must admit, it felt very nice to be with people who love and admire America. Most people that I have met in Novi Sad like America, but our host, having visited for a time in New York City and other cities LOVES America.

We sampled the local cuisine at each meal in our hotel and after having cooked at home for practically every meal since I have been here (eating out is too costly), it was nice to let someone else do all the work for a while. The local "black" wine (what red wine is called in Serbia and Montenegro) is very good...smooth and flavorful...not too heavy or sweet. We drank the local water as well as bottled mineral water with no ill effects to my digestion. I'm afraid I can't say the same for the water in some American cities that I have visited!

After several days in Podgorica, we took the train back to Novi Sad. We arrived in early morning and have rested most of this week. The visit was fun and productive, but it's good to be back "home"!

And They Call The Wind Kosava

2007-03-04T12:31:00.000+01:00

We woke in early morning to the sound of hail pounding down on the terrace and roof. It hailed on Friday afternoon as well. The weather has been gorgeous in the morning and then deteriorates by dusk.

This afternoon, we have strong wind. Here's what Wikipedia says about the wind here in Novi Sad..."The southeast-east wind Košava, which blows from the Carpathians and brings clear and dry weather, is characteristic of the local climate. It mostly blows in autumn and winter, in 2-3 days intervals. The average speed of Košava is 25-43 km per hour but certain strokes can reach up to 130 km/h. In winter time, followed by a snow storm, it can cause snowdrifts."

This wind is very powerful. I must run and close all of the windows and doors as it will blow things off of tables and walls as it blows through. It also brings in dirt and grit.

Our apartment is on the top floor of our building and listening to this wind blow with such ferocity is quite intimidating. It howls!

Warmer Than Usual Weather

2007-02-23T12:34:00.000+01:00

The weather here has been beautiful. Highs in the upper fifties or mid sixties most days. Some rain late at night, or in early morning, but sunny with clean fresh air by midmorning.
Most people I speak with worry about "climate change". They say it is warmer than usual and tell me of heavy snows in years past. I don't know what I think of this. In America, some places such as Chicago, Denver and New York City have experienced very heavy snows and lower than normal temperatures.
This weekend we are off to visit my love's sister at her weekend home on the Danube. Saturday's weather is supposed to be clear and very nice.

Wonderfully Romantic Day

2007-02-16T11:37:00.000+01:00

Valentines Day was really special for me this year, here in Novi Sad. My love came home from work with a single red rose for me. It touched my heart that he would be so thoughtful and kind and that he wanted so much to please me.
That night we went to the Radio Novi Sad Auditorium for a concert to celebrate the 50th Anniversary of their Tamburitza Orchestra. The show lasted about 2 hours and had beautiful Tamburitza music, singing and a packed house. So many people were there, and many had to be turned away as no seats were available for them.
My love was able to get seats for us on the front row in the center.
The show was broadcast live on TV Novi Sad.
After the show we walked home, slowly and just talked. Relaxed, happy and in love....that pretty much sums up my feelings right now.

Funeral in Novi Sad

2007-02-14T06:40:00.000+01:00

I went to a funeral the other day. It was my first here. In many ways, it was like funerals in the South(in the US, where I am from), but it was also very different.
The woman who died was a very nice lady that I had met before I went back to the US and that I had seen again just a week or so ago. She died suddenly and at a relatively young age.
The night before the funeral, we went to visit her family...to pay a condolence call. I was able to meet her husband, her two daughters and a son-in-law. All of them were warm and friendly people.
It is traditional to drink a little rakija (brandy) with the family "for the soul" of the departed. I think this is a lovely tradition. Everyone spoke quietly of the one who was missing from the table. I think my companion brought comfort to the husband and family, and hopefully I did not detract.
Like so many of the young people here, one of the daughters spoke English and seemed to enjoy my being there. We spoke of her children and mine and looked at photographs. She spoke of her interests and aspirations. I think I have made a new friend.
The next day, we all rode on a chartered bus to the very large cemetary here. This woman was employed at a school, so the bus was arranged for by the school. Many teachers and staff attended the funeral.
Once we arrived at the cemetary, we viewed the body and then waited a little while and were ushered in to a large room where the casket and a large flower cart holding all of the flowers people brought was wheeled in.
Members of her family spoke about her and her life. A recording of what we would call "Taps" began to play and we all filed slowly out. As we processed down to where the grave site was, silently and slowly, this music expanded into a beautiful anthem of some sort. I am assuming that this is played traditionally at funerals.
As we walked, the flower cart was first, followed by a man carrying a wooden marker with her name on it and the year of her birth and her death. Then several men carried the casket. The immediate family came next and then everyone else...friends and other relatives.
At the grave site, the daughter chose a floral arrangement provided by the family and it was buried on top of the casket itself. A few family members stepped forward and put in a handful of dirt. Then, very solemly, the dirt was filled back in.
As we left the grave site a small table was set up with a container of water for washing hands and a towel, a very large loaf of bread and small paper cups of rakija. My companion told me that this was a tradition as well. I was to take a little bread and eat it and then take a small cup of rakija. I was told to pour just a drop out on the ground...an offering for her soul, as before and then drink the rest. Then, we continued on to the bus.
The bus took us back to the school where a reception was set up with food and drink. The family and those who wanted to were welcomed by school staff and we spent some time there, speaking quietly.
This whole experience was touching to me. It reinforced what I have already come to know...life is so short and can change so quickly. All we really have in the end is love. This woman's husband loved her very much as did the rest of her family and friends.
There must have been about 100 people at this funeral. Where I am from, that is alot of people for a funeral of someone who is not in the public eye.

I Have Returned!

2007-02-09T10:15:00.000+01:00

I have returned from a two month trip back to the US. I had some loose ends to tie up there and my departure was sudden.

While I was in the US, eating junk food as well as just regular high calorie home cooked meals, I really packed on some pounds. Altogether about 15 pounds. Of course, it was during Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years, so I'm sure I am not the only American who put on a few pounds...hahaha.

I was also very unhappy to be away from here and food becomes solace sometimes....not a good thing, I know.

I am so happy to be back here, where food is healthy and where I can walk off this weight. We have been walking everyday, visiting friends, running errands, holding hands and just enjoying the peacefulness of this place and celebrating our love for each other.

When I got back, I was greeted by everyone as if they had looked for me everyday. It made me feel so good. My love has done everything he can do to make sure I am comfortable, even though my return was also fairly sudden and he had little time to prepare.

It has been unseasonably warm here. A week or so before I came back, they had a little bit of snow fall. And the day I flew in, it had snowed a bit in Belgrade.

I am from the South, so naturally the thought of a beautiful snowfall appeals to me. I am hoping it will snow soon. Not a dramatic snowfall, just a few inches would be fine.

This weekend, we will take a train up to the North to visit family. I am looking forward to seeing what that part of Serbia looks like. I think Novi Sad is the most beautiful part, but of course I am prejudiced and partial towards green grass, dark farmland and seeing mountains in the distance on a beautiful, clear day. (They call them hills, but for a flatlander from Louisiana, they are mountains.)

If anyone else is reading this, please take a moment to celebrate with me my return to this special place with such special people.

I Love To Walk Here

2006-11-16T10:09:00.000+01:00

One of the things I love the most about Novi Sad is that you can walk anywhere, anytime. I am able to walk around town from dawn to midnight and it is safe. I would never do that where I come from, it is just not safe. There are also bike lanes on many of the main streets between the sidewalk and the street. Where I am from in America, (Louisiana), I have only seen bike lanes on the street itself.

When I go somewhere here, I mostly walk or ride the bus. Sometimes a friend will pick us up who has a car, but that is rare. The buses are usually fairly crowded, but people are considerate. They let older women sit down, they aren't loud or obnoxious. They pretty much sit quietly and chat. I have no problems at all with the bus - where I am from I never rode the bus because, of course, I had my own car.

I love to walk, though. It is good excersize and the air smells clean and when it blows from the Danube, it is cool and refreshing. There are parts of town with beautiful homes and trees. There are many high rise apartments here, some painted in bright colors to look at. There are local landmarks like the Sports Center and of course the town center which is fantastic, although it is touristy. There are little parks tucked away here and there to sit and rest in.

People watching is fun, too. The people here are attractive. I like to see them out walking their dogs, young couples holding hands, older couples walking and talking. It is very peaceful to me and very nice.

My first blog post ever

2006-11-12T12:53:00.000+01:00

Today I begin this blog by saying hello. I have been in Novi Sad for about 6 weeks now. I am living here with a man I met in America. He is Hungarian/Croatian and this is his home.

I don't speak the language, but am trying to learn. I am beginning to understand what the native speakers are saying...at least the essence of the conversation.

Over the past 6 weeks, I have visited many places and had many pleasant experiences. Before I met this man, I had very little knowledge of Serbia, just like many Americans. So far, I have found the people here to be very friendly and helpful to me.

Hospitality to guests seems to be something very important here. Everyone we visit brings out the food and drink and you must have "just a little". An American woman that I met who has lived here for over 40 years told me that I would gain a kilo in my first month. I'm sure that has already happened!

My plans for this blog are to talk about the food, the city and the people of this wonderful place and hopefully some of you will want to visit one day. I think that more tourism would be wonderful for the economy of this place and it definitely has charm and beauty. Also, I want to have a place to say the things that come to my mind about life and love and other wonderful things.